Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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