five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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