it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
Cake is only good when you eat it
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.