My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
