There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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