Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I yelled at your uterus for you.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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