Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
