party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
cat food counts as protein by the way
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Randomize