So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
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Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
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They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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