At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
