I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
