you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
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