wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
