Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize