dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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