I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Randomize
