Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
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