if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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