bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
