i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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