Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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