yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
