Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
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Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
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So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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