My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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