I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
