You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize