You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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