he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
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If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
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you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
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