i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
