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I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
of course. lets lasso hookers.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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