eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
