Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize