i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
