in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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