I think I won the penis lottery.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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