these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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