The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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