yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Randomize
