Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Banned from zoo.
Again?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
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