I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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