I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
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