yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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