This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
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