so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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