Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize