Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
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