Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize