Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize
