I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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