when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize