it wasn't lemon gatorade
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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