i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
